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Toxic positivity

It's okay not to be okay!

It's okay to be in a bad mood sometimes! Trying to deny negative feelings can lead to dire consequences, psychologists worldwide warn. Any attempt to escape and avoid the negative can fail extremely. The avoidance of suffering is a form of suffering - wrote the American writer Mark Manson in his book The Subtle Art of not giving a Fuck. 

For British therapist and psychologist Sally Baker, "the problem with toxic positivity is that it denies all the emotional aspects that we feel about a situation and face a challenge." It may seem contradicting itself, but positivity can be toxic. Not everyone can be exceptional in everything and that is a good thing. If you accept your limits, you will find the strength you need.

positive vibes only

Positive psychology vs. toxic positivity

To understand toxic positivity, we must first distinguish it from positive psychology. The concept looks similar, but in the end it is completely different. The so-called “positive psychology” was popularized by the psychologist Martin Seligman, who worked a lot with depression and began to study from a scientific point of view what makes a person happy.

In his famous book The Optimistic Child, Seligman explains that the pessimist is not born, but created. However, the psychologist points out that we can combat this pessimism by allowing more positive thoughts. But that doesn't mean you have to focus on being happy when you're sad. You must first recognize and accept the problem. The secret is not to take positivism to extremes.

How does toxic positivity affect us?

British psychologist Sally Baker explains: “The rejection of emotions is extremely bad for your health. If you hide your mental difficulties behind a facade of positivity, they will be reflected in your body in alternative ways, from skin problems to irritable bowel syndrome. " Suppressing emotions exhausts us both mentally and physically. It's not healthy, and it's not sustainable in the long run either.

Is Toxic Positivism in Fashion?

Psychologist Baker believes that nowadays, through social media, we automatically compare our lives more. "There is a constant tendency on social media to be perfect and happy. But that is exhausting and does not correspond to reality," says the British woman. "If there was more honesty about the weak points, we would feel more free to experience all kinds of emotions. We are human and have to allow ourselves to feel the full range of emotions. We cannot be positive all the time." 

We should remember that all feelings are authentic and that these emotions are valid.

* This report is not a medical article. If you have symptoms of depression or need help, contact your doctor or psychologist.

"It's okay
not to be happy
all the time."
 

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